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rubala
09-03-2004, 12:37 PM
Hi all,
Crashed and burned twice, its so frustating to find a better half. That too with so much of hype in media, the average girl's expectations have soared high making it tough even for an above average guy to find the right partner.

Not sure, how many of you have faced it.. but its frustating to compromise and get into a wedlock ?. Do you guys think such a marriage will succeed ??

vasan
09-03-2004, 03:01 PM
So sorry to hear about the frustrations, Rubala. There is too much hype alright - and expectations and eventual shake up of faith and confidence....

In my purely personal opiion, frustrations shouldn't lead to faulty conclusions, however... While its not very pleasant to be too calculative, it is still a lot better to keep the eyes open, (and the mind as well), so 'compromises' we make ultimately, will not be unpalatable in the long journey.. We all will end up making many compromises, no matter what, and some of them might be what is right even for us. But we should be mindful of loosing our own identities much. We can be changed and compromised but not in the core of our own personality.

Some how its sounds too complicated and treacherous route, doesn't it.. Wish I could write clearly.. but, please note.. you are not alone. Pretty much every one faces it.. :( Sad, but true..

Good luck !!

Vasan

ps: I am sure there are plenty of people with more experience and wisdom to offer suggestions and counsel.. both among your friends and family. And in Geetham. Don't be discuraged, alright.. !! :)

vasan
09-03-2004, 03:03 PM
Rubala,

I will move this to Love/Relationship section. More appropriate there, and many more users might see and write back. OK..?

Vasan

Bluelotus
09-03-2004, 09:35 PM
Hi Rubala,

(welcome to geetham first of all :wink: )
You seem to have a stress management problem :ee:
perhaps before looking for a suitable partner look into yourself. Get to "know thyself" as the sybil told Socrates.
Crashing and burning is quite serious ...try time management tactics.

about a soul mate...
many believe that soulmates are not simply your romantic life partners...they could infact be anyone...siblings, friends...
soul mates or kindred spirits are certainly worth having for they will enhance your self...but they are not necessary ..or so I believe


And about wedlock...

stop thinking about "the right partner" ...for there isn't a right or wrong partner
and compromising is not such a big deal...you do it every moment of you life ...most of the time without realising.

serioulsy ...stop thinking negatively...always try your best to have positive thoughts....

do you really want to marry?

do you feel ready for the commitement matrimony requires?

if you can answer "yes" to the above then go ahead..if not perhaps you should wait a while.

If you do get the time please DO look through the Love and relationship subforum...it contains much info on human inter-relationships...and certainly quite a lot on marriage.

stop all thoughts and talks of frustration
make a list of REASONABLE requirements you have for a partner
examine the list carefully..get rid of all frivolous ones (eg such as one with a nose ring or one with almond eyes..or some such friperies :ee: )

and perhaps go see a marriage broker :wink: ... :oops: sorry that was a very poor joke :ee:

I mean at list by establishing what you wish for in a future partner you may have better luck.

good luck dude :b:
hope it all works out...


blue.

cs19724
09-03-2004, 10:28 PM
look into the following thread,

http://www.geetham.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=11821

only look for my POST not others, coz they'll confuse you more :|

ferny
09-04-2004, 04:10 AM
Hi Rubala

Welcome to Geetham :)

Don't get discouraged. Its just a matter of time....

I think if you keep your mind and eyes open you'll find that speacial someone.

Someone told me that God makes 6 more people like you. So your chances of meeting someone with your tastes is better...:think: I think.

Anywhooo Good luck rubala. :b: